Chair of MeToo! Poetics
Beyond Academia LLC Board of Directors Founding Member
– Born ’80, Akron, Ohio
– Sarah Lawrence College, Naropa University (MFA ‘05)
– Boulder Poetry Scene since 2003
– Author of The MeToo Poems, Taxis and Shit, Pizzas and Mermaid
– Published in Monkey Puzzle, Semicolon, Fast Forward, Love Shovel Review, Recipes for the Apocalypse, Lunamopolis, etc…
– Featured at Burnt Toast, Laughing Goat, Boulder Fringe Festival, Noname Bar, Innisfree, 303 Vodka, Arise Music Festival, Mercury Café, F-Bomb Flash Fiction, Bombay Gin Reading Series, Boulder Arts Week, NoBo Arts District First Friday, Blue Owl Bookstore, Bouldering Poets
– Winner of 2015 Frozen Dead Guy Days Dead Poetry Slam (as Bukowski)
– Hosted Innisfree Open Mic, Starwater Wednesday, MeToo Nights, F-Bomb Flash Fiction, Front Range Westminster English Faculty Reading
– Curator of boulderpoetrytribe.com
– Former taxi driver, now English Professor at Front Range Community College
– For writing, pictures, videos and more, visit jonathan-montgomery.com
WRITING SAMPLE
shi’t earlier’d loveshovel’s toil’t
(from LSR 5)
imagination earlier’d
on their troublexotic flushingism
waterdoom
stinkdrain and ranchid
pipes to mousetrap
down dangle plunger
deep pit whoknows?
always possible the cloggy-not
they may shittin:
“Mine ain’t as smelly or brown as yours.”
reality soonenuff’d tho
on urgehard bowelgassy
then how a halfbucket
where sinking shower
when poor wipe
what cheezybate
who holejuggle
why no handle on this shuv’l??????
of course then helpless’d
a Mountain oh but ploppy
a flood fail
turder and pape
a lingerswamp
poo hoo, poo hoo
panic earlier’d
on bathruin’s unlove
until the lever suddenly’d up
the fast-it high’d row
the cascade magic’d all
and a poetry school’d thru
learning the finallyvoosh!
what a fulfill!
a sux-away-sess!
LoveShovel toil’t victory!
You too?
Awww!
(from LSR 4)
I have a cute little Beast.
“You suck,” he squeaks.
And then I just want to give him a nosey.
“Here,” I say. “I got this cute little sailor suit for you to wear.”
I put it on him and he makes a face.
“You’re destined to fail at everything you try,” my baby Beast says.
“Ay ay, Cap’n!” I salute him and laugh.
Then I take his sailor hat off and pet his head over and over.
“I love you,” I say.
“You’re unlovable,” my little pet Beast says.
But then I smush my face into his soft fur and make nonsense sounds at him
“Beasty-boosty-boo!” I say.
And he tries to squirm away but he can’t.
“I’m going to grow big and bad again,” my cuddly stuffed Beast says, “and then you’ll pay for this.”
“Awww!” I say, “I know you really love me. I know you’re just trying to protect me from the other beasts, my adorable little Beezy-eee-eee-eee!”
Then I snuggle and squeeze him really hard til all the juice comes out and I’m so much bigger and stronger there is nothing he can do to stop me.
Chair of MeToo! Poetics
Beyond Academia LLC Board of Directors Founding Member – Born ’80, Akron, Ohio – Sarah Lawrence College, Naropa University (MFA ‘05) – Boulder Poetry Scene since 2003 – Author of The MeToo Poems, Taxis and Shit, Pizzas and Mermaid – Published in Monkey Puzzle, Semicolon, Fast Forward, Love Shovel Review, Recipes for the Apocalypse, Lunamopolis, etc… – Winner of 2015 Frozen Dead Guy Days Dead Poetry Slam (as Bukowski) – Curator of boulderpoetrytribe.com – Former taxi driver, now English Professor at Front Range Community College
Love Shovel Ranch 